2.07.2007

I Am 30.

Two years ago, I walked into work on my 28th birthday to find my office door shut. "Strange," I thought. I peeked through the window to see odd light reflections. I couldn't figure out what was going on in there. I opened the door to find the office waist-high in black balloons.

I thought, "If I get this for 28, what's gonna happen on my 30th Birthday?"

Last night, I found out.

Now, I was innocent that first birthday when I was pranked. Now, I am not so much. Since the Black Balloon Incident, there have been tinfoilings, strung offices and offices completely emptied. Since I have many people out for revenge, I knew I was gonna get hit hard. Add that to this "milestone birthday" and the sum is trouble.

Thus, I knew some prank was going to happen. I've been very suspicious for about 2 weeks of anything that was said or done out of the ordinary. I've thought through so many scenarios and ideas that I probably could have said, "I thought maybe this is what you'd do" to about anything they did. Not that I knew what they were gonna do, but I had considered lots of possibilities. I even had fleeting thoughts that maybe they'd strike my truck or my home, so I moved the truck around the parking lot often and kept the bed-lid locked. I've booby-trapped the office at night. I also thought maybe they'd do something in the hallway of my condo. But I was counting on them not being able to get into the building, much less my condo.

I went to dinner with The Intended last night. Driving home, I didn't even think that maybe the Pranksters had gotten into my house. I wasn't thinking that anything was out of the ordinary. I wasn't expecting anything until this morning. In fact, I considered stopping by the office on my way home last night to see if the Pranksters were there and surprise them. But I wanted to get home. When I did, my bedroom door was almost completely shut. "Oh no," I thought. I opened the door to find my bedroom filled with nearly 1,000 balloons. They hit me at my home. And they got me good.
It's all come full circle. The balloons were back. But this time they are colorful with celebration--and not black with aging regret. Very nice. The Pranksters deserve credit. This was hard work. They have raw and bloody fingers. They have no oxygen left. They didn't have flavored balloons to make the work more pleasant. And they struck me unaware. I tip my cap. And feel celebrated.

After jumping into the colorful mass and playing in the balloons, I began the long work of popping enough to go to bed. There's still a lot in there. Designer Doug said this morning: "Did you feel like you were sleeping in a music video or a political rally?"

My sister thinks it would have more funny if they filled my bedroom with balloons while I was sleeping. That would have been a feat...but then again, I may have suffocated on latex.

You know, I love birthdays. And I love Todd Super Week. And this is a good one so far (except for that Bears thing). Turning 30 seems like a big deal. It's a big milestone, but increasingly I am learning with every birthday that you never really think of yourself as an adult. You never feel older. I can't believe that as this age my dad was supporting a family with a 5-year-old and a 3-year-old. I am no adult. Am I? Could I do that?

People pointed out to me yesterday that it was the last day of my 20s. Again, that seems significant. But what does it really mean? And how do you celebrate that? Go do something stupid one last time? I don't know. But I did have a beer at dinner and got really goofy off it. That told me that I am definitely not in my 20s anymore. I just don't drink much anymore...and have no tolerance at all.

Anyway, I am now 30 in body. But about 12 in mind. And I'll probably stay that way. I can't wait until my friends fill my room at the nursing home with balloons. Then too, they will have to work around all my Star Wars toys...

2 comments:

the dreamer said...

Happy 30th Todd!! Hope your office/apartment/hallway/truck smells like something *other* than 12 pine-tree air fresheners during the super week of Todd. And always.

And here's a thought. Maybe instead of Todd Week, it's Todd Year. You turn 30, you get married ... and the White Sox bring home another World Series trophy.

Are you going to Salt Creek on Friday?

the todd said...

Dang, Dreamer. We went on the birthday lunch yesterday because not everyone could make Friday. I should have contacted you. Drat.

I like the way you're thinking with Todd Super Year. I mean, think about it: I turn 30, I get married, I go to Europe, Harry Potter 7 comes out, The Bears go undefeated in the 2007 regular season, and the Sox beat the Cubs in the series in 5 games. Greatest. Year. Ever.