9.15.2006

A virtual gushing current in my pocket

FRIDAY FLASHBACK
One day when I worked at CT, I was down in the lunchroom heating up my TV dinner. When it was done, I realized that the TV Dinner was so large and hot that I needed two hands to carry it. But I had a can of Sprite too. Easy enough. I slipped the soda can in my front pants pocket. (It was unopened.)

I walked up the stairs, through the door onto the first floor and then around a tight corner where a short metal filing cabinet jutted out. I took the corner too sharply and I heard a "Tink" and then a "SSSSSSSSSSS." I didn't really realize what had happened. I kept walking. And then, I felt a cold sensation against my leg. My brain suddenly reliazed that the metal corner had pierced the can in my pocket. It started as a trickle. And became a spray. Soon, I had a virtual gushing current streaming out of my pocket. The dark circle grew along my right hip and then rushed down the outside of my leg.

It all happened very quickly. One minute I am a guy with a TV dinner walking along the hallway. The next, I am a guy still holding a TV dinner but with a soaked leg of Khakis now weighing about 80 pounds. I set the TV dinner down and pulled the can out of my pants. Sprite shot down the hall. I put my hand over the hall and rushed it to the bathroom. I threw the can into the sink. The sweet sugary smell became intoxicating.

After throwing the drained can away, I retrieved my TV dinner. My sock was now wet and made that squishy sound when I walked. The entire pant leg was dark brown, sticking to my leg and dripping. Who knew a can of pop holds that much soda?

I grabbed my truck keys from my office and popped my head into my boss Ted's office. "Hey, I am running home," I said. "I need new pants."

When I got back, my TV Dinner was cold. And I had no Sprite to drink.

PTOIT Quotes of the Week

"So today at work everyone thought it was my birthday for some reason, and there was even brownies...so I went with it." - My sister.

"I have an idea for a movie discussion guide and would like your permission to pursue it. It is based on the film Snakes On a Plane and is centered around getting a better understanding of God's Judgment." -A real e-mail recieved by our company.

"The only juicing Ryan has ever done is apple or orange." --Ryan Howard's brother Chris in a discussion of steroids.

1 comment:

Mark Ahn said...

better sprite that something else.